The Weenie Stand


One day, I was at a hotdog stand, and the dude servin’ weenies got my order freaking wrong. “Yo man, this ain’t the right dog!” I yelled from behind the counter. He didn’t freakin’ respond. I grabbed my glass, and swung it at the man. He ducked, it, but it didn’t help. The glass smashed into the back of his head. He looked at me with a fierce look.
“Listen dude, you don’t wanna get in a fight with me!” he yelled. I didn’t care. I punched that man in the face. “What’s your problem?” the man yelled. A croud was gathering behind me. I was gonna show off. I yelled “Yo dude, yo hot dogs ain’t right!”. The man looked at me. “This is your last warning! Before I call the cops.” I punched him. “That’s it!” he yelled. He jumped out of the weenie stand and kicked me in the belly.
I grabbed the hot dog stand, and pulled it down on him. He stood up, wiped the blood from his face and started throwing hot dogs at me. I dodged them, then he picked up the whole stand and threw it at me. As soon as it hit me, I ran away. It crushed me. I looked at the man who was smiling. He took some more weenies. “At least I still have these!” he shouted, before running away. “NOOO! NOT THE WEENIES!” I screamed.
I pulled myself from under the stand, watching the man run away and get in a car made of weenies. “I won!” I shouted. As the car sped over the horizon, I heard the man laughing. “I’ll get you!” he laughed as he dissapeared. I sat up, wiped the weenie juice of my face and walked home. Then, Saturday hit me faster than a weenie. On Saturday, I decided to go back to the weenie stand. The man wasn’t there, instead, it was a toddler.
The toddler looked at me. “Hewo siw, what wood yo wike fwom da weenie stand?” she asked in a babyfied tone. Thinking this must be a joke, I said: “Listen, you little punk, is this some messed up joke?”. The baby looked at me, before crying. She took a glass of salt and threw it towards my eyes. It smashed into my eyes, I screamed. I could hear the baby laughing menacingly at me. Other people started laughing at me. Was this weenie stand cursed? I didn’t care.
I ran away, crying, I heard the baby laughing his diaper off. The weenie stand has always been surprising, and once, when I went there, there was a sabor-toothed tiger behind the counter. “H-Hello?” I said. He looked at me. “ROAAARRRR!” He screamed. “AHHHHGHGGG!” I ran away, and the tiger was chasing me! “NICE KITTY! NICE KITTY!” He continued chasing me. I got home and locked the door. I heard the tiger banging on the door, trying to get in.
I boarded up the doors, before the outside was silent. “Is he out there?” I muttered to myself. I slowly opened the door…….. being sure…. that he wasn’t there… nothing! I walked completely outside. “Few!” I said. The door to my house shut and I was locked out. I knocked on the door, incase my wife was there, and the person who opened the door wasn’t my wife.
It was the sabor-toothed tiger.